No Idea Where This Came From....

After Reading some Magazines,

I 

Got Inspired,

and decided that a new and cleaner way for people to travel...

is the brand spankin' new and innovative

(put on your best car salesmen voice and read the rest aloud)

"Cloud Transportation"...

(YES, those clouds move.....squint really hard and
remember what the weather was like on Wednesday, April 27th)

For those of you who are unfamiliar with such technology,

Cloud Cars are the Ultimate Slowing Machine!

They not only are made of condensed water vapor
(thank you 5th grade science)...

but also are the ONLY car that Hydrates itself and its passengers simultaneously! 

Standard models come equipped with soft, luxurious cushion seats,

and a Really Nice View.. definitely one for the books!

(it's New to EVERY Human Being)!!

Be the first to jump on this bandwagon, or don't..

and just lounge back in the deluxe model, 

in our nice Charcoal Gray,

equipped fully with Electric Shock and Rolling Thunder Massages,

ThunderBolt 2000!

(Yes, that sounds like a Harry Potter Broom...

It Was Meant To)

Not quite caught on to the Cloud Series yet?

No worries,  our OldSchool Tree Models are a nice alternative.

The only mode of transportation that Gets you all the way From Point A...

To the Exact Same spot in 0-3 seconds flat

(Some models take 0-30s or even 0-2:00min

due to the mental processing capability of the driver)

They come in the standard Bark for the exterior color and solid Wood for interior.

As an Extended BONUS to the Standard Models, 

some come fully equipped with a "Pimp MY Tree" Feature

and change colors (according to the season that it's in), 

Along with rain, sun, sweat, snow, chills, and a free cold or flu of the season!! 

It's like Eastmakuhth Day all year long!

(For those 2:00 processors,

that would be

Easter, Christmas, Hanukkah and Birthday

all rolled into one)...

top that Seth Cohen.